Hey Paula Abdul! Just Because It’s The Kids’ Choice Awards Doesn’t Mean You Have To Dress Like a Tween

April 2, 2009 · Print This Article

One Of These Days Paula And Miley Cyrus Will Both Finally Wear Something Age-Appropriate

It might be possible to get a buzz from whatever cocktail of crazy on the rocks with a side of lime Paula Abdul is consuming just from looking at her. ‘Cause clearly the last time she had a sober moment was in the early 2000s when Avril Lavigne was all the faux emo/riot girrrl rage and teens flocked to Hot Topic for all their “life is like, so hard, and I hate my parents, wah” accessories. So in a misguided effort try to look younger and funkier and more in-tune with These Kids Today, the American Idol judge styled herself in her angsty best. HT was evidently having some kind of five for $10 sale.

But as Paula’s outfits go, it’s not even near her worst. The mounds of chains. The fingerless gloves. The chunky black boots. All that’s missing is the chipped black nail polish and “f**k you, mom and dad” expression on her face. Though with her Botox problem, doing more than blinking and stringing a bunch of slurred words together in something distantly related to English at the same time is a mystery medical science has yet to conquer. So yes, remarkably this Flashdancing “Like There’s No Tomorrow” in a bizarre version of Michael Jackson’s “Bad” video look is actually an improvement. Just think how great the choreography in that video would be. You just know Fall Out Boy’s Pete Wentz is scoping her outfit for pieces he wants to borrow.

And at least Paula erased the moustache Simon Cowell drew on her. Normally she would have coordinated it with an eye patch and swashbuckler’s sword. Which would have been all kinds of awesome.

Step out in style in these ‘Saturn’ ankle booties from Charles by Charles David. They’re “Crazy Cool.”

By ShoeMinx Idol Paige Muller

Written by Paige · Filed Under The Daily Pump
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Hey Paula Abdul! Just Because It’s The Kids’ Choice Awards Doesn’t Mean You Have To Dress Like a Tween

One Of These Days Paula And Miley Cyrus Will Both Finally Wear Something Age-Appropriate

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